With 2025 behind us, I’m pleased to announce that we can enter the Year of Our Lord 2026 laughing at CNN’s dismal ratings and imminent death.

Throughout last year, CNNLOL managed to attract an average of only 580,000 total primetime viewers and 105,000 average viewers in the 25-54 age group that sets advertiser rates — and let’s face it, without trial attorneys and Big Pharma, CNN would be lucky to have any advertisers at all.

The news was no better for CNN in total day viewers, where CNN averaged just 436,000 total viewers and 71,000 demo viewers.

In every 2025 metric compared to the previous year, CNNLOL was down-down-down.

CNN defenders might…

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